No, gaining weight is not abusive to your fiance. It is essential to distinguish between personal choices, body changes, and abusive behavior. Comparing weight gain to physical abuse or drug addiction is not appropriate and not an equal comparison.
Abuse is a pattern of behavior that involves control, manipulation, and harm inflicted on another person physically, emotionally, or mentally. Gaining weight is a natural part of life for many people, and it does not fall under the category of abusive behavior.
While it's understandable that people may have personal preferences or concerns about health, discussing weight gain should be done with sensitivity, respect, and understanding. Making someone feel guilty or ashamed about their body changes is not a healthy or constructive way to address the issue.
Healthy relationships are built on mutual respect, support, and open communication. If your fiance is struggling with accepting your weight gain, it would be beneficial for both of you to have an open and honest conversation about how you feel and what you both need from each other in terms of support and understanding.
If your fiance is genuinely struggling with his response to your weight gain, it might be helpful for him to seek therapy to work through his feelings and learn healthy ways to cope with personal issues or concerns. However, it's important to emphasize that seeking therapy should not be used as a means to justify comparing weight gain to abusive behavior.
In any case, if you feel uncomfortable, disrespected, or emotionally harmed by your fiance's behavior, it is crucial to set clear boundaries and communicate your feelings. If the situation persists or becomes emotionally abusive, consider seeking support from a counselor or therapist to help you navigate the relationship dynamics. Remember, your well-being and emotional health should always be a priority in any relationship.