Yes, it is not uncommon for individuals in a family to present a positive image to society while directing their negative emotions and abusive behaviors towards a scapegoat within the family. This dynamic is known as "family scapegoating" and is a form of emotional and psychological abuse.
In these situations, the abusive family member (whether it's a dad, brother, or any other family member) may manipulate their public persona to appear kind, charming, and well-regarded in the community. They may actively maintain this image to ensure that their abusive behaviors remain hidden from others. Meanwhile, they target a specific family member as the scapegoat onto whom they project their frustrations, anger, and negative emotions.
The scapegoat, in this case, is often unfairly blamed for various family issues and conflicts, even if they are not the actual cause. This role can be isolating and damaging to the scapegoat's self-esteem and mental well-being. The other family members may inadvertently or intentionally ignore the abuse or downplay its severity, contributing to the continued silence and secrecy surrounding the issue.
Family scapegoating can be challenging to detect from the outside, as the abusive family member may be skilled at presenting a different image to the public. It takes a careful and observant eye to recognize the signs of such an unhealthy family dynamic.
If you suspect that someone you know is experiencing family scapegoating or any form of abuse, it is essential to offer support, compassion, and understanding. Encouraging open communication and providing resources for professional help, such as therapy or counseling, can be valuable steps to assist the individual in breaking free from the cycle of abuse.