Leaving a verbally abusive relationship when children are involved can be incredibly challenging, but it's essential to prioritize your safety and the well-being of your children. Here are some steps to consider when planning to leave a verbally abusive relationship:
Ensure your safety first: If you feel physically unsafe, seek help immediately. Contact a local domestic violence hotline or a shelter to discuss your situation and explore options for emergency assistance.
Create a support network: Reach out to friends, family members, or support groups who can provide emotional support, understanding, and practical help during this time.
Consult a professional: Seek guidance from a therapist or counselor who specializes in abusive relationships. They can offer insights, coping strategies, and support tailored to your situation.
Document the abuse: Keep a record of instances of verbal abuse, especially if they escalate or become threatening. This documentation could be essential if legal action becomes necessary.
Develop a safety plan: Plan your exit strategy carefully. Identify a safe place to go with your children, such as a friend's house or a domestic violence shelter.
Financial planning: Start saving money discreetly, if possible, to help support yourself and your children during the transition. If you have joint accounts, consider opening a separate bank account.
Legal advice: Consult with a family law attorney to understand your rights and options regarding child custody, child support, and any necessary legal proceedings.
Inform someone you trust: Let a friend, family member, or neighbor know about your plans to leave. Having a support person aware of your situation can provide an extra layer of protection and support.
Protect your documents: Gather important documents, such as birth certificates, passports, social security cards, and any legal or financial papers, and keep them in a safe place outside the home.
Inform the children: If appropriate, have a conversation with your children about what's happening, ensuring their safety and emotional well-being. Reassure them that the abuse is not their fault and that you are working to keep everyone safe.
Restraining order or protection order: If you fear for your safety, consider obtaining a restraining order or protection order against your abusive partner.
Leaving the home: When the time comes to leave, try to do so with a support person present. Be prepared to leave quickly and discreetly.
Seek professional help for the children: After leaving, consider counseling or therapy for the children to help them cope with the emotional impact of the abusive relationship.
Remember that leaving an abusive relationship can be a complex process, and the safety of you and your children should be the top priority. Don't hesitate to seek help from professionals, support groups, or domestic violence hotlines. They can offer guidance and resources to assist you in navigating this challenging time.