I'm sorry to hear that you're going through such a difficult situation. Discovering infidelity can be extremely painful, and it's completely understandable that you might want to take some time and space for yourself to heal and process what has happened.
However, when it comes to shared financial responsibilities like rent, it's essential to approach the situation with empathy and fairness. While it's not your responsibility to support your boyfriend, leaving him without any warning or preparation could create unnecessary hardship for him. A sudden departure might lead to financial strain, impacting his ability to pay the bills and possibly even affecting his living situation.
Here are some suggestions on how to handle the situation with empathy and fairness:
Have an honest conversation: Sit down with your boyfriend and calmly explain your feelings and reasons for needing space. Communication is essential, and it's better to be upfront about your intentions rather than abruptly leaving.
Offer a transition period: If possible, consider giving your boyfriend some time to make alternative living arrangements or find a new roommate to help share the financial burden.
Financial support (if possible): If you're in a position to do so, you might offer some financial assistance during the transition period or until he can find a solution to manage the bills on his own. This is not obligatory, but it could ease the immediate burden.
Discuss financial responsibilities: If both of your names are on the lease or bills, figure out how you'll handle these financial obligations moving forward. This could involve a discussion with your landlord or finding a subletter if necessary.
Seek support from friends and family: Encourage your boyfriend to reach out to his support network for help during this challenging time.
Remember that you also need to take care of yourself emotionally, so make sure you have your support system in place too. Seek guidance from friends, family, or even consider talking to a therapist to process your emotions and experiences.
Ultimately, leaving a relationship is a personal decision, and you must prioritize your well-being and happiness. However, approaching the situation with compassion and understanding can make the process more manageable for both of you.