Narcissists can use a range of manipulative tactics and hurtful statements during a breakup to maintain control, shift blame, or devalue their partner. Here are some things a narcissistic person might say during a breakup:
Gaslighting: They may try to make their partner doubt their own perception of reality, saying things like, "You're overreacting," "It didn't happen that way," or "You're being too sensitive."
Blame-shifting: Narcissists often avoid taking responsibility for their actions by putting the blame on their partner. They might say, "This is all your fault," "You made me do this," or "If you were better, I wouldn't have to leave."
Emotional manipulation: They may use guilt-tripping and emotional manipulation to keep their partner hooked or feeling guilty. For example, "You'll never find someone like me," "You're nothing without me," or "You're ruining my life by making me do this."
Triangulation: Narcissists may involve a third person to create jealousy or insecurity in their partner, saying things like, "I have someone else who appreciates me," or "I'm leaving you for someone better."
Dismissive statements: They may belittle their partner's feelings and emotions, saying things like, "You're just too sensitive," "You're making a big deal out of nothing," or "You're just being dramatic."
Love-bombing followed by devaluation: Some narcissists might initially express love and affection to draw their partner in, only to later devalue and discard them with statements like, "I never loved you," "You meant nothing to me," or "Our relationship was a mistake."
Threats and intimidation: In extreme cases, narcissists may resort to threats, either to scare their partner into staying or to control them even after the breakup. For example, "If you leave me, I'll ruin your life," or "I'll make sure nobody ever loves you again."
Manipulative promises: They may make empty promises of change or improvement to entice their partner to stay, even though they have no intention of following through.
It's important to remember that not everyone who says hurtful things during a breakup is a narcissist. However, if you notice a consistent pattern of manipulation, lack of empathy, and a desire to control and devalue you, it could be a red flag for narcissistic behavior. If you are dealing with a breakup involving a narcissistic individual, seeking support from friends, family, or a mental health professional can be beneficial for your emotional well-being.