The conflicting statements made by people with Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) regarding how they feel about themselves can be attributed to several characteristic features of the disorder:
Identity Instability: People with BPD often struggle with a fragmented or unstable sense of self. They may have difficulty establishing a coherent and consistent self-identity, leading to contradictory self-perceptions and feelings about themselves.
Emotional Intensity and Instability: BPD is characterized by intense and rapidly shifting emotions. This emotional volatility can lead to conflicting self-perceptions, as their feelings about themselves can fluctuate drastically within a short period.
Idealization and Devaluation: Individuals with BPD may engage in idealizing themselves at times when they feel positive or successful, and then switch to self-devaluation when they experience failure or disappointment. This pattern of idealization and devaluation can lead to contradictory statements about their self-worth.
Fear of Abandonment and Rejection: The fear of being abandoned or rejected by others is a significant concern for individuals with BPD. They may express positive self-perceptions to seek validation and acceptance from others, while internally experiencing self-doubt and negative self-beliefs.
Black-and-White Thinking: People with BPD often struggle with black-and-white thinking, also known as splitting. They may see themselves as either all good or all bad, without recognizing the complexities and nuances of their self-image, which can lead to conflicting statements.
External Influences and Social Context: The way individuals with BPD feel about themselves can be heavily influenced by external factors, such as the people they are interacting with or the social context they find themselves in. Their self-perception might change depending on the approval or disapproval they receive from others.
Past Traumatic Experiences: Many individuals with BPD have a history of trauma, abuse, or invalidating environments, which can contribute to conflicting self-perceptions. Past negative experiences can shape their beliefs about themselves and affect how they relate to their emotions and identity.
Coping Mechanisms: In response to distress and emotional dysregulation, individuals with BPD may use defense mechanisms like denial, projection, or dissociation. These coping strategies can create contradictions in how they express and understand their feelings about themselves.
It's important to approach individuals with BPD with empathy and understanding, as their internal struggles can be complex and distressing. Psychotherapy, especially dialectical behavior therapy (DBT), can be highly beneficial for individuals with BPD, helping them explore and integrate their sense of self, manage emotions, and build healthier coping mechanisms.