It's not uncommon for individuals with Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) to have difficulties in relationships, including romantic ones. People with BPD may experience intense emotions, have challenges with emotional regulation, and struggle with fears of abandonment and rejection. They may also engage in patterns of idealizing and devaluing others.
In the aftermath of a breakup, especially if it was tumultuous, it's not uncommon for hurt and angry feelings to arise. People with BPD may have difficulty processing and managing these emotions, and as a defense mechanism, they may try to shift blame onto others, including their ex-partners. Accusing someone of being narcissistic is one way some individuals with BPD might cope with feelings of rejection and disappointment.
It's important to remember that making accusations of narcissism is a subjective judgment and should not be taken as a definitive assessment of your character. A diagnosis of Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD) is a complex and serious clinical diagnosis that should only be made by a qualified mental health professional based on thorough evaluation and assessment.
You mentioned that your therapist did not see any narcissistic traits in you, which is a positive indication. Therapists are trained to assess personality traits and disorders, and their professional opinion carries more weight than an ex-partner's subjective viewpoint.
If you find yourself struggling with the aftermath of the breakup or feeling affected by the accusations, it might be beneficial to continue working with your therapist to process your emotions and navigate through the challenges of the breakup in a healthy way. This can help you gain insights into yourself, your emotions, and the dynamics of the past relationship.
Remember, everyone has their perspective and emotions, and sometimes, after a breakup, feelings can be intensified. Focus on your personal growth and well-being, and don't let accusations define your self-image or worth.