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The perspective of people with borderline personality disorder (BPD) who assert that their emotions are real, despite being influenced by their illness, can be understood from several angles. It's important to remember that individual experiences and perceptions can vary significantly, and not everyone with BPD will express the same thoughts or feelings. Here are some potential reasons why some individuals with BPD may feel this way:

  1. Emotional intensity and validation: People with BPD often experience emotions more intensely than others. For them, these emotions can be overwhelming and very real in the moment. Acknowledging the reality of their emotions might be a way of seeking validation for the intensity of their feelings, even if they recognize that the emotions might be influenced by their condition.

  2. Identity and self-validation: Emotions are an essential part of human experience, and for someone with BPD, their emotions may play a significant role in shaping their self-identity. By affirming the reality of their emotions, they may be asserting the validity of their own experiences and trying to establish a sense of self-validation.

  3. Coping mechanism: Emotions are complex, and they can serve various purposes, including coping with distress. For someone with BPD, emotions might act as a way to cope with internal struggles and external challenges. Recognizing the reality of their emotions may be a way to navigate and process these overwhelming feelings.

  4. Emotional dysregulation: BPD can lead to emotional dysregulation, making it difficult for individuals to understand or control their emotions effectively. In the midst of an emotional episode, they may genuinely believe that their feelings are entirely real, even though they know that BPD influences their emotional responses.

  5. Challenging stigma: Mental health conditions, including BPD, have often faced stigmatization, with some people dismissing their emotions as merely a symptom of an illness. By asserting the realness of their emotions, individuals with BPD may be attempting to challenge this stigma and advocate for more understanding and empathy.

  6. Desire for acceptance: People with BPD may yearn for acceptance and validation of their experiences from others. Emphasizing the reality of their emotions might be an attempt to communicate the intensity and authenticity of their emotional struggles in hopes of gaining understanding and support.

  7. Cognitive distortions: BPD can involve cognitive distortions, where thoughts and perceptions may become skewed during emotional episodes. In these moments, individuals might genuinely believe their emotions are entirely valid, even if they later recognize that they were influenced by their illness.

It's essential to approach these situations with compassion and empathy. Emotions, whether influenced by mental illness or not, are still a crucial aspect of an individual's experience. Validating their emotions while acknowledging the role of BPD in influencing those feelings can help foster better communication and understanding within relationships and therapeutic settings. Encouraging open conversations about emotions and mental health can lead to more significant insights and opportunities for healing and growth.

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