I'm really sorry to hear that you experienced such a difficult and painful situation during your childhood. Child abuse is a serious issue, and it can have profound and long-lasting effects on individuals.
There could be several reasons why your parents might not admit to the physical abuse you experienced:
Denial: Some individuals find it hard to accept and acknowledge their actions, especially if they are ashamed or feel guilty about their behavior. Denial can be a coping mechanism for them to avoid facing the reality of what they did.
Self-protection: Admitting to abuse could have legal and social consequences, leading to possible legal actions, loss of custody, or damaged relationships with other family members or the community.
Fear of judgment: Acknowledging abusive behavior can be difficult because they might fear being judged or rejected by others, including family and friends.
Cognitive dissonance: Some people may have a distorted perception of their actions and genuinely believe that their behavior was not abusive or that it was justified in some way.
Cultural or generational factors: In some cultures or generations, admitting to child abuse may be seen as a sign of weakness or failure, making it even harder for them to admit their actions.
Psychological factors: Some individuals may have personality disorders, mental health issues, or unresolved trauma that contributes to their inability to admit their abusive behavior.
Please remember that none of these reasons justify or excuse the abusive behavior you endured. Child abuse is never acceptable, and the responsibility for the abuse lies solely with the abuser.
If you are still dealing with the consequences of your childhood experiences, it might be helpful to seek support from a professional therapist or counselor. They can provide you with a safe space to process your emotions and help you develop coping strategies to heal from the past.
If you are in an unsafe situation or need immediate assistance, please reach out to local support organizations or helplines that can provide you with guidance and resources. Remember, you don't have to face this alone, and there are people who care and want to help.