I'm really sorry to hear that you're experiencing such a difficult and painful situation. Verbal and emotional abuse is never acceptable in a healthy relationship, and it's essential to address this issue seriously.
It's important to understand that abusive behavior is not a sign of love; it's a sign of control and manipulation. Abusers often use expressions of love or apologies as a way to maintain power and control over their victims. This pattern can be confusing and emotionally damaging, as it creates a cycle of abuse and reconciliation.
There could be various reasons why your husband exhibits this behavior, but it's crucial to remember that it is not your fault. Abusive behavior is a choice made by the abuser, and it's not something you caused or can fix on your own.
If you feel safe and comfortable doing so, consider having an open and honest conversation with your husband about his behavior and its impact on you. However, it's essential to prioritize your safety and well-being. If you feel you cannot talk to him directly or if the abuse continues, seek support from friends, family, or a professional counselor.
If you are in immediate danger, please reach out to local authorities or a domestic violence hotline for help and support. Remember that you deserve to be treated with respect, love, and kindness in your relationship.