It can be incredibly challenging and painful to be in a situation where someone you care about still has feelings for their ex-partner. While I can't know the specifics of your situation, there are a few possible reasons why someone might keep you around despite having lingering feelings for their ex:
Comfort and Familiarity: Even if they still have feelings for their ex, being with you might provide a sense of comfort and familiarity. Starting a new relationship can be daunting, and being with someone they know and trust, even if they don't have the same level of romantic feelings, can feel safe.
Emotional Support: Your partner may appreciate the emotional support and companionship you provide. Having you in their life might help them cope with the emotions they still have for their ex.
Fear of Being Alone: Some people may be afraid of being alone or fear the uncertainty of being single again. They might stay in a relationship even if their heart isn't entirely in it because they don't want to face the prospect of being by themselves.
Hoping for Change: Your partner might be hoping that their feelings for their ex will fade over time or that the relationship with you will develop into something more meaningful.
Comparison: They might compare you to their ex, looking for similarities or differences and attempting to move on by finding someone "better."
Avoiding Hurting You: They might be afraid of hurting you by breaking up, especially if you are deeply invested in the relationship.
Regardless of the reasons, it's crucial to have open and honest communication about your feelings and concerns. If you suspect that your partner still has strong feelings for their ex, it's essential to discuss it calmly and openly. Communicate how you feel and what you need from the relationship. If the situation is causing you significant distress, consider seeking support from friends, family, or a therapist.
Ultimately, it's vital to prioritize your own well-being and happiness. If you find yourself in a situation where you are not getting the love and respect you deserve, it might be worth evaluating whether staying in the relationship is the best choice for you. Remember, you deserve to be with someone who genuinely loves and cherishes you.