The perception that honest and straightforward people are disliked while fake but diplomatic people are loved is not universally true, but there are some reasons why it might appear this way in certain situations or contexts:
Immediate Comfort: Diplomatic people often prioritize maintaining harmony and avoiding conflict in the short term. This can make them more likable in the moment because they may not challenge others' beliefs or express controversial opinions. On the other hand, honest individuals may be more willing to address uncomfortable truths or express their genuine feelings, which can sometimes lead to initial discomfort or disagreement.
Politeness: Diplomatic individuals tend to use polite and tactful language, which can be more socially acceptable and pleasing to others. Honest and straightforward people may be perceived as blunt or rude, especially if they do not employ the same level of diplomacy in their communication.
Validation and Flattery: Fake but diplomatic people might be more skilled at providing flattery and validation, which can make others feel good about themselves. They may also be more adept at tailoring their interactions to match others' preferences, creating a sense of being liked or appreciated.
Fear of Confrontation: Some individuals prefer to avoid confrontation or uncomfortable conversations. Diplomatic people may be seen as more accommodating and less likely to challenge others, making them more appealing to those who dislike conflict.
Social Norms: Societal norms and expectations can influence how people perceive and respond to different communication styles. In some cultures or environments, diplomacy and politeness are highly valued, while directness may be considered impolite or inappropriate.
Trust Issues: Ironically, people might mistrust honest and straightforward individuals, fearing that they may be too candid or unguarded, potentially hiding something or not being genuine.
Sensitivity to Criticism: Some individuals are more sensitive to criticism and may prefer to surround themselves with people who avoid giving direct negative feedback. Diplomatic individuals may be better at delivering criticism in a less direct or softer manner, which can be more palatable to such individuals.
It's essential to recognize that the perception of likability can vary greatly depending on individual preferences, cultural norms, and specific circumstances. While diplomatic behavior can help navigate social situations more smoothly, honesty and straightforwardness are valuable traits that foster trust, authenticity, and deeper connections in the long term.
Ultimately, being genuine and diplomatic need not be mutually exclusive. Striking a balance between honesty and diplomacy can lead to effective communication and better relationships with others.