Feeling scared or anxious during debates or arguments is a common experience for many people. There could be several reasons why you feel this way:
Fear of confrontation: Some individuals naturally feel uncomfortable with confrontation or conflict. They may worry about potential negative outcomes, such as hurting the other person's feelings, damaging relationships, or being perceived negatively.
Lack of confidence: If you lack confidence in your knowledge or ability to articulate your thoughts effectively, you might fear being proven wrong or not having valid points to support your position.
Fear of judgment: The fear of being judged or criticized for your opinions can also contribute to anxiety during debates. You might be concerned about what others will think of you if you don't present your arguments convincingly.
Emotional sensitivity: If you are emotionally sensitive, the intensity of debates and arguments can be overwhelming, leading to a desire to avoid such situations altogether.
Past negative experiences: Previous negative experiences during debates or arguments may have left a lasting impact, making you reluctant to engage in them again.
To address these feelings and develop more confidence in debates or arguments, consider the following strategies:
Knowledge and preparation: Thoroughly research the topic you wish to discuss and understand various viewpoints. Being well-informed will boost your confidence during the conversation.
Practice active listening: Pay attention to the other person's points and try to understand their perspective. Active listening can help create a more constructive and less combative discussion.
Respectful communication: Focus on maintaining a respectful and calm tone during the debate. Avoid personal attacks and instead, stick to discussing ideas and arguments.
Set boundaries: Establish boundaries for the conversation, and if it becomes too heated or disrespectful, be willing to step back or suggest revisiting the discussion at a later time.
Start small: Engage in low-stakes debates or discussions with friends or family members first to build your confidence gradually.
Embrace mistakes: Understand that making mistakes or not having all the answers is part of the learning process. Don't be too hard on yourself; instead, use those moments as opportunities for growth.
Seek support: Consider seeking support from a trusted friend, family member, or a professional therapist or counselor to work through any underlying fears or anxieties.
Remember that developing the ability to have constructive debates and stand your ground takes time and practice. Be patient with yourself and focus on continuous improvement rather than expecting immediate change.