Feeling like everyone else is perfect while you make mistakes is a common cognitive distortion known as "compare and despair." It's essential to recognize that this perception is often a distortion of reality and doesn't accurately reflect the truth about other people or yourself. Several factors contribute to this feeling:
Social Media and Comparisons: Social media platforms often present a filtered and curated version of people's lives, emphasizing their achievements, positive experiences, and successes. Comparing yourself to these idealized representations can lead to feelings of inadequacy and self-doubt.
Self-Criticism: People tend to be their harshest critics. When you make a mistake, you might be more inclined to focus on your flaws and shortcomings, while overlooking the imperfections and struggles of others.
Highlight Reel vs. Behind the Scenes: It's important to remember that what you see of others is often their "highlight reel" – the best and most positive aspects they choose to share. In contrast, you are more aware of your own "behind the scenes" – your vulnerabilities, insecurities, and mistakes.
Imposter Syndrome: Many individuals experience imposter syndrome, where they believe they are not as competent or deserving of success as others, attributing their achievements to luck or other external factors.
Personalization: You might tend to take personal responsibility for mistakes and setbacks, while attributing the successes of others to external factors, such as luck or inherent abilities.
Overcoming these feelings requires a shift in perspective and self-compassion. Here are some suggestions to help:
Practice Self-Compassion: Treat yourself with the same kindness and understanding that you would offer a friend who made a mistake. Remember that everyone makes errors and faces challenges in life.
Limit Social Media Exposure: Be mindful of the time you spend on social media and remind yourself that what you see there is often a carefully curated version of reality.
Challenge Negative Thoughts: When you catch yourself comparing and feeling inadequate, challenge those thoughts and replace them with more balanced and realistic perspectives.
Focus on Your Progress: Celebrate your achievements, no matter how small they might seem. Recognize the efforts you make and the progress you've achieved.
Seek Support: Talk to friends, family, or a therapist about your feelings. Sharing your experiences with someone you trust can provide valuable insights and emotional support.
Remember, it's entirely normal to make mistakes, and nobody is perfect. Embracing your imperfections and learning from your experiences can lead to personal growth and a more positive outlook on life.