I'm sorry to hear that you had to experience such hurtful and negative behavior from your mother. It's essential to remember that people can react and behave in hurtful ways for various reasons, and it may not necessarily be a reflection of your worth or capabilities.
While I cannot know the exact reasons behind your mother's behavior in this specific situation, there are some general possibilities:
Emotional issues: Sometimes, people lash out and say hurtful things when they are dealing with their emotions, stress, or personal problems. It's possible that your mother was feeling overwhelmed or frustrated about something unrelated and unfortunately took it out on you.
Communication difficulties: Some individuals struggle with expressing their feelings and needs in a constructive manner. Instead of communicating their concerns effectively, they resort to aggressive or hurtful language.
Unresolved issues: There may be underlying issues or past conflicts that your mother has not addressed, leading to a buildup of negative emotions that eventually spilled over.
Expectations and pressure: If your mother has certain expectations for you and feels that you are not meeting them, she might express her disappointment through anger.
Personal insecurities: People who have their insecurities may project them onto others. Criticizing or belittling others might be a way for them to temporarily feel better about themselves.
Lack of coping skills: Some individuals may not have learned healthy coping mechanisms for dealing with stress or frustration, leading to outbursts of anger.
It's important to remember that her words do not define your worth or capabilities. It's natural to feel hurt and upset when faced with such behavior, but try not to internalize her negative words. Seek support from friends, other family members, or a therapist to help you process your emotions and navigate through challenging situations.
If you feel comfortable doing so, consider having a calm and open conversation with your mother about how her words affected you. Remember to use "I" statements to express your feelings and avoid blaming language. However, if you fear that having such a conversation might escalate the situation or not yield positive results, seeking professional help, such as family therapy, could be a viable option to address the underlying issues in a constructive manner.