There could be various reasons why some men (or individuals, regardless of gender) exhibit emotionally cold and distant behavior while also enjoying talking about themselves:
Social conditioning: Societal norms and traditional gender roles can sometimes encourage men to suppress emotions and display emotional distance as a way to appear strong or avoid vulnerability. In such cases, they might feel more comfortable discussing factual or external aspects of themselves rather than their emotions.
Fear of vulnerability: Some individuals, including men, may have experienced past emotional pain or have been taught that showing vulnerability is a sign of weakness. As a result, they may be hesitant to open up emotionally to others, even while sharing factual information about themselves.
Difficulty recognizing emotions: Some people have trouble identifying and understanding their own emotions. They might be aware of the more surface-level aspects of their life, such as their interests and accomplishments, but struggle to connect with their deeper feelings.
Communication style: Certain individuals prefer talking about themselves because it feels safe and familiar. It can be a way to maintain control over the conversation and avoid delving into topics that might be uncomfortable or emotionally charged.
Past experiences: Past traumas or challenging life experiences can lead individuals to build emotional barriers as a protective mechanism. Sharing factual information can feel less threatening than discussing personal emotions.
Lack of emotional intelligence: Emotional intelligence involves the ability to understand, manage, and express emotions effectively. Some people may lack developed emotional intelligence, making it difficult for them to connect with and express their feelings.
Attachment styles: Insecure attachment styles developed in early childhood can influence how individuals relate to others in adulthood. Some individuals with avoidant attachment styles may display emotional distance as a way to cope with intimacy and emotional connection.
It's essential to recognize that everyone is unique, and there can be a combination of factors influencing an individual's behavior. If you find yourself dealing with someone who fits this description, it's crucial to approach them with empathy and understanding. Encouraging open communication and creating a safe space for emotional expression can sometimes help people gradually become more comfortable with sharing their feelings. However, if their emotional distance significantly impacts your relationship or well-being, seeking the support of a professional therapist can be beneficial in navigating such situations.