It's not uncommon for conflicts and misunderstandings to arise between parents and their children. There can be various reasons why your mom may be shouting at you, and it's essential to address this issue constructively. Here are some possible reasons and suggestions on what you can do:
Possible Reasons Why Your Mom Shouts:
Stress and Frustration: Your mom might be dealing with stress or frustration from other aspects of her life, and unfortunately, this may cause her to express her emotions through shouting.
Communication Issues: Sometimes, ineffective communication can lead to misunderstandings, and when emotions run high, shouting might be the default response.
Parenting Style: Some parents have a more authoritarian or assertive parenting style, which could lead to shouting as a way to assert authority.
Expectations and Pressure: Your mom might have certain expectations or pressures for you, and when those aren't met, she may react with anger.
Modeling Behavior: If your mom grew up in an environment where shouting was the norm during conflicts, she might unconsciously replicate that behavior.
What You Can Do:
Stay Calm: When your mom starts shouting, try your best to remain calm. Responding with anger and back answering might escalate the situation further. Take a few deep breaths and try to keep your emotions in check.
Find the Right Time: When emotions are high, it's not the best time to have a productive conversation. Wait for a calm moment to discuss the issue.
Express Your Feelings: Talk to your mom about how her shouting makes you feel. Use "I" statements to express yourself, such as "I feel hurt when you shout at me."
Listen Actively: When your mom speaks, listen carefully to what she is saying. Sometimes, understanding her perspective can help de-escalate conflicts.
Seek Understanding: Try to understand her viewpoint and what might be causing her stress or frustration. Showing empathy can make a difference.
Avoid Back Answering: As tempting as it might be to back answer, it usually doesn't help the situation. Instead, focus on maintaining a respectful tone.
Propose Solutions: If there are specific issues that lead to conflicts, suggest constructive solutions to address them together.
Seek Support: If you find that the shouting and conflicts persist and negatively impact your relationship, consider seeking support from a family counselor or therapist. A professional can help both you and your mom improve communication and resolve conflicts more effectively.
Remember, improving communication and resolving conflicts takes time and effort from both parties. Be patient and persistent in your efforts to have a more positive and constructive relationship with your mom.