Dealing with people who treat us as enemies when they are angry and then forget about it once their anger subsides can be challenging and emotionally draining. Here are some strategies to consider when facing such situations:
Stay calm and composed: When someone treats you like an enemy, it's essential to remain calm and composed. Responding with anger or aggression will likely escalate the situation further. Instead, try to maintain your composure and avoid becoming reactive.
Give them space: When the person is angry, it may be best to give them some space to cool down. Sometimes, people say hurtful things in the heat of the moment that they don't truly mean. By allowing them time to calm down, you might avoid unnecessary confrontation.
Seek understanding: Once the person's anger has subsided, try to have an open and honest conversation with them. Seek to understand why they reacted the way they did and how their emotions may have influenced their behavior. Showing empathy and a willingness to listen can help in resolving misunderstandings.
Set boundaries: If this behavior becomes a recurring pattern, it's essential to establish healthy boundaries. Let the person know that their behavior is not acceptable and that you will not tolerate being treated as an enemy. Be firm but respectful in asserting your boundaries.
Communicate assertively: When discussing the issue, use "I" statements to express how their behavior affected you. For example, say, "I felt hurt when you treated me like an enemy during our argument." This approach is less accusatory and encourages open dialogue.
Limit your exposure: If the person's behavior continues to be toxic or harmful, consider limiting your exposure to them. You may need to distance yourself from people who consistently treat you poorly, especially if they show no willingness to change.
Seek support: Talk to trusted friends, family members, or even a therapist about your experiences. Sharing your feelings and getting outside perspectives can provide valuable support and guidance.
Focus on self-care: Dealing with challenging individuals can be emotionally draining. Make sure to take care of yourself by engaging in activities that promote well-being and reduce stress.
Forgive but set boundaries: If the person sincerely apologizes and acknowledges their behavior, you can choose to forgive them, but still maintain boundaries to protect yourself from future harm.
Remember, it's not your responsibility to change others or their behavior, but you can choose how you respond to it. If someone's anger and subsequent forgetfulness continue to negatively impact your well-being, it may be necessary to evaluate the relationship's overall health and consider if it's worth maintaining.