Question

My 13-year-old grandson has had a lot of trauma. When he got mad he said he would burn me alive. Now I can’t sleep well at night. He apologized, but I’m still uneasy. What should I do?

Answer 1

It's important to prioritize your safety and well-being. Here are some steps you could consider taking:

1. Communication: Have an open and honest conversation with your grandson about his feelings and actions. Encourage him to express his emotions in a healthier and non-threatening way.

2. Seek professional help: Given the history of trauma and the intensity of the threat, it might be beneficial for your grandson to talk to a therapist or counselor. They can help him address and cope with the trauma and anger in a constructive manner.

3. Family support: Involve other family members in the conversation to offer support and understanding. It's essential for your grandson to know that he has a strong support network.

4. Safety measures: Ensure your safety by taking any necessary precautions. If you feel threatened or unsafe, consider discussing the situation with other family members or authorities who can help.

5. Boundaries and consequences: Establish clear boundaries and let your grandson know what is acceptable behavior and what is not. Discuss potential consequences if the behavior escalates.

6. Encourage positive outlets: Encourage your grandson to engage in healthy activities that can help him manage his emotions, such as sports, hobbies, or artistic pursuits.

7. Patience and understanding: Trauma can have long-lasting effects, so try to be patient and understanding with your grandson as he works through his emotions. Healing takes time.

8. Consider family therapy: Family therapy can be beneficial for everyone involved, as it provides a safe space to address and resolve underlying issues that may be contributing to the situation.

9. Take care of yourself: It's essential to prioritize your well-being. Consider seeking support for yourself, whether it's talking to a therapist, joining a support group, or confiding in friends and family.

Remember, it's crucial to involve professionals if you feel overwhelmed or unsure how to handle the situation. A mental health professional can offer personalized advice and guidance tailored to your specific circumstances.