No, it is not wrong for you to feel upset or overwhelmed in this situation. It can be incredibly challenging and emotionally draining to constantly be the recipient of someone else's unresolved trauma and emotional struggles, especially when you are not equipped to handle it on your own.
While it's essential to have empathy and understanding for your mother's experiences, it is also crucial to recognize that it is not your responsibility to "solve" her emotional repercussions or be her sole support system. As her child, you deserve to have your emotional boundaries respected, and it is not fair for her to unload her trauma onto you without considering the impact it may have on you.
It's essential to set healthy boundaries to protect your emotional well-being. Here are some steps you can consider taking:
Express your feelings: Communicate openly with your mother about how her constant focus on her childhood trauma is affecting you. Let her know that while you care about her, it is difficult for you to handle this burden alone and that you need some emotional space for yourself.
Encourage professional help: Suggest that your mother seeks professional therapy or counseling to work through her childhood trauma with a trained mental health professional. Professional therapists are equipped to provide the support and guidance she needs.
Seek support for yourself: Consider talking to a therapist or counselor to process your own feelings and develop coping strategies for dealing with your mother's emotions. A mental health professional can provide an unbiased perspective and help you navigate your emotions in a healthy way.
Set boundaries: Establish clear boundaries with your mother regarding the topics of conversation and the amount of emotional support you can provide. Let her know what you are comfortable discussing and when you need space.
Encourage a support network: Encourage your mother to build a support network beyond just you. This can include friends, family members, or support groups where she can share her experiences and find understanding.
Remember that while you can offer empathy and support to your mother, you cannot be solely responsible for her healing journey. It's essential to prioritize your own well-being and set healthy limits to maintain a balanced and healthy relationship with her. Seeking support and guidance from a mental health professional can be beneficial for both you and your mother as you navigate this complex situation.