A person with complex childhood trauma might shut down when their therapist tells them they are proud of them due to various reasons related to their trauma experiences and coping mechanisms. Here are some possible explanations:
Emotional overwhelm: For someone with a history of childhood trauma, receiving positive emotions, such as praise or pride, might trigger overwhelming feelings. These individuals may have learned to suppress emotions as a way to protect themselves from pain, so when they receive praise, it can be difficult for them to process and respond to it.
Fear of vulnerability: Childhood trauma can lead to a fear of being vulnerable or open with others. Receiving praise may make the person feel exposed or unsafe, leading them to shut down as a way to protect themselves from potential harm.
Belief in unworthiness: Individuals who have experienced complex childhood trauma often develop deep-seated beliefs that they are unworthy or undeserving of praise and positive attention. When the therapist expresses pride in them, it can clash with these negative self-perceptions, leading to confusion and withdrawal.
Trust issues: Trust is essential in therapy, especially for individuals with a trauma history. If the person has difficulty trusting others due to past betrayals or broken attachments, they may struggle to accept or believe in the sincerity of the therapist's praise.
Learned self-reliance: Growing up in an environment where support was lacking or inconsistent, the person might have learned to rely solely on themselves. They may be uncomfortable with the idea of being praised or supported by others, as it challenges their self-reliant coping mechanism.
Emotional flashbacks: Praise and positive attention from the therapist could trigger emotional flashbacks, where the person feels overwhelmed by past emotions and experiences as if they were happening in the present moment. This can lead to a shutdown response to cope with the distressing feelings.
Fear of dependence: For some individuals, receiving praise might feel like a form of emotional attachment or dependence on the therapist. Due to their history of complex trauma, they might fear forming close emotional connections, leading to a shutdown response as a way to maintain distance.
It's crucial for therapists to be aware of these possibilities and approach their clients with empathy, sensitivity, and understanding. A trauma-informed therapist can help the individual explore and process these reactions in a safe and supportive therapeutic environment, fostering healing and growth over time. Building a trusting therapeutic relationship and addressing the underlying trauma is essential for helping the person navigate and overcome these challenges.