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When expressing to a therapist that you feel you are not making progress and would like to be referred to someone else, it's essential to be open and honest about your feelings while maintaining respect and professionalism. Here are some steps to consider:

  1. Choose the right time and setting: Request a dedicated session to discuss your concerns, rather than bringing it up at the end of a regular session. This way, you and your therapist can have sufficient time to talk about the matter without feeling rushed.

  2. Be clear about your feelings: Start the conversation by stating that you value the therapeutic relationship and the work you have done together. Then, express your feelings honestly and without judgment. Share that you don't feel you are making the progress you had hoped for.

  3. Provide specific examples: It can be helpful to give specific examples of situations or areas where you feel stuck or unproductive in therapy. This can help your therapist better understand your perspective and make improvements.

  4. Avoid blaming or criticizing: While it's essential to be honest, try to avoid blaming or criticizing your therapist. Focus on your own experience and feelings rather than pointing fingers.

  5. Express your preferences for a referral: If you already have someone else in mind whom you would like to be referred to, let your therapist know. Alternatively, if you're open to their recommendations, express that you would appreciate their help in finding a suitable referral.

  6. Ask for their input: Encourage your therapist to share their perspective on the situation. They might have insights that could be valuable in understanding the progress (or lack thereof) in therapy.

  7. Stay open to discussion: Be open to discussing your concerns further if your therapist wishes to explore the issues and work through them together. Sometimes, difficulties in therapy can be addressed and resolved with open communication.

  8. Firmly state your decision: If, after the discussion, you still feel the need to change therapists, assert your decision firmly but politely. It's essential to advocate for your needs and what you believe will be best for your progress.

Remember that therapy is a collaborative process, and open communication is crucial for its success. A professional therapist will respect your decision and work with you to find the best course of action moving forward. If you encounter any difficulties in expressing your feelings or if you believe that your concerns are not being taken seriously, you have the right to seek a second opinion or request a referral to another therapist. Your well-being should always be the top priority in the therapeutic process.

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