When someone consistently makes a conversation about themselves when you try to share something personal, it could be due to several reasons:
Lack of Empathy: Your boyfriend may struggle with empathizing and understanding your feelings and experiences fully. As a result, he might try to relate by sharing his own experiences, even if they are not entirely relevant to your situation.
Insecurity: Some individuals use self-referential behavior as a defense mechanism to redirect attention away from topics that might make them feel uncomfortable or vulnerable. By talking about themselves, they can avoid delving into deeper emotional discussions.
Communication Style: Certain people have a habit of relating to others primarily through their own experiences. They might not be aware of how their behavior affects the flow of the conversation or how it can make the other person feel.
Need for Validation: Your boyfriend might feel the need to seek validation or attention by talking about himself, especially if he perceives that you are getting a lot of attention by sharing something personal.
Lack of Listening Skills: Active listening requires genuine interest in the other person's feelings and experiences. If your boyfriend struggles with active listening, he may unintentionally steer the conversation back to himself.
Emotional Disconnect: There might be a disconnect between how he perceives the importance of your feelings and experiences versus his own. This could lead him to prioritize his own experiences over yours.
If you find this behavior concerning or it bothers you, consider having an open and honest conversation with your boyfriend about how you feel when he redirects the focus to himself. Communication is vital in any relationship, and discussing your concerns can help him become more aware of his communication style and its impact.
Additionally, try to create a safe and supportive environment for both of you to share personal experiences without judgment. Encourage active listening and validate each other's feelings. It might take time and effort to change communication patterns, but with understanding and mutual respect, you can foster healthier communication in your relationship.