Feeling anxiety when your boyfriend holds your hand is not uncommon, and it can be considered normal to some extent. Relationships can bring about intense emotions, and anxiety may arise due to various reasons:
Emotional Intimacy: Holding hands is a form of physical and emotional intimacy. For some individuals, this closeness can trigger feelings of vulnerability and anxiety about being emotionally exposed.
Fear of Judgment: Anxiety may stem from worries about what others might think or how they perceive your relationship. Concerns about being judged or scrutinized by others can lead to heightened anxiety.
Past Experiences: Previous experiences or trauma in past relationships may influence your emotional responses in your current relationship, leading to anxiety in specific situations.
New Relationship: If the relationship is relatively new, it's common to experience anxiety as you navigate the early stages of emotional attachment and commitment.
Social Anxiety: If you have social anxiety, physical affection in public settings may trigger anxious thoughts about being watched or evaluated by others.
General Anxiety: Generalized anxiety disorder can cause individuals to experience anxiety in various situations, including those that involve physical touch or emotional intimacy.
Attachment Style: Your attachment style, which is influenced by early life experiences, can impact how you perceive and respond to closeness and intimacy in relationships.
It's important to remember that every person and relationship is unique, and what feels normal or comfortable for one person may not be the same for someone else. If your anxiety is causing significant distress or negatively affecting your relationship, it may be helpful to explore these feelings further.
Consider the following steps:
Self-Reflection: Reflect on your feelings and try to identify the specific triggers and underlying causes of your anxiety. This self-awareness can be the first step toward addressing and managing your emotions.
Communication: Talk to your boyfriend about your feelings. Honest communication can foster understanding and support between partners.
Seek Support: Consider talking to a therapist or counselor who can help you explore your feelings of anxiety and provide coping strategies to manage them.
Take It Slow: If you're uncomfortable with physical affection in certain situations, communicate your boundaries to your partner, and take things at a pace that feels more manageable for you.
Practice Self-Compassion: Be kind to yourself and acknowledge that it's okay to feel anxious. Developing self-compassion can help reduce self-criticism and create a more positive emotional environment.
Remember that it's okay to seek help if you're struggling with anxiety in your relationship. A mental health professional can provide valuable guidance and support as you work through your emotions and build a healthy, fulfilling relationship.