Feeling like a girlfriend of convenience can be hurtful and frustrating, and it's important to address the issue in your relationship. Here are some steps you can take to navigate this situation:
Communicate your feelings: Sit down with your boyfriend and have an open and honest conversation about how you feel. Express your concerns and let him know that you'd like to spend more quality time together and feel more appreciated in the relationship.
Choose the right time and place: Make sure you choose a calm and private setting to discuss your feelings. Avoid bringing up the topic during an argument or when either of you is stressed or distracted.
Use "I" statements: Focus on expressing your feelings using "I" statements to avoid sounding accusatory. For example, say, "I feel hurt when I'm always the one making plans" instead of "You never make plans with me."
Listen to his perspective: Give him a chance to express himself and listen carefully to what he has to say. There might be underlying reasons for his behavior that he hasn't shared yet.
Assess the relationship: Take some time to evaluate the overall health of your relationship. Consider if this issue is isolated or if there are other aspects of the relationship that need attention.
Set boundaries: If your boyfriend's behavior doesn't change even after your conversation, consider setting some boundaries for yourself. For example, you could communicate that you won't be making plans all the time and would appreciate him taking the initiative occasionally.
Reevaluate your priorities: Think about what you want and need in a relationship. If you consistently feel unappreciated and undervalued, it may be time to reassess whether this relationship is meeting your needs and making you happy.
Seek support: Talk to friends or family members you trust about your feelings and get their perspective. Sometimes an outside viewpoint can help you gain clarity on the situation.
Consider relationship counseling: If the issues persist and you both want to work on the relationship, consider seeking professional help from a couples counselor. A therapist can facilitate communication and provide tools for improving the relationship.
Remember that you deserve to be in a relationship where you feel valued and appreciated. Don't be afraid to address your feelings and advocate for your needs. Ultimately, the best course of action will depend on the unique dynamics of your relationship and how willing both of you are to work on it together.