Seeking revenge or attempting to cheat on your partner as a response to something they did in the past is not a healthy or constructive way to address issues in a relationship. Engaging in revenge or infidelity will likely lead to further damage and more significant problems in your relationship.
If your boyfriend has done something hurtful in his past, it's essential to address the issue directly and communicate openly about your feelings. Here are some steps you can consider taking:
Self-Reflection: Take some time to reflect on your emotions and the reasons behind your desire for revenge. Understand that acting out of revenge rarely leads to positive outcomes and can deepen the rift between you and your partner.
Communication: Have an honest and calm conversation with your boyfriend about the past incident that is bothering you. Express your feelings and concerns without resorting to blame or judgment.
Forgiveness: If your boyfriend has genuinely shown remorse for his past actions and has taken steps to grow and change, consider whether you can forgive him and move forward together. Forgiveness doesn't mean forgetting but rather letting go of the past to build a better future.
Couples Counseling: If the issue is too complex to handle on your own, consider seeking the help of a professional couples counselor. A therapist can help facilitate communication and provide tools to work through the challenges you're facing.
Set Boundaries: If the past issue continues to affect your relationship negatively, discuss and set clear boundaries that both of you can follow to prevent similar issues from recurring.
Consider Your Happiness: If you find that you cannot move past the past incident, it might be worth evaluating whether the relationship is healthy and fulfilling for you. Ending a relationship can be difficult but sometimes necessary for personal growth and happiness.
Remember that revenge and infidelity rarely lead to positive outcomes and can cause immense pain and damage to all parties involved. Instead, focus on open communication, understanding, and working together to heal and strengthen your relationship. If the challenges are too great to handle alone, consider seeking professional help to navigate through them.