Determining who is the "bigger " in this situation might be a matter of subjective interpretation. However, it's essential to consider a few points:
Tipping: In the United States, tipping is a customary practice, and the standard tip for good service is typically around 15-20% of the bill. While it is entirely up to you how much you want to tip, a 12% tip on a $300 bill might be considered below the average tip for good service.
Server's reaction: The server's reaction, while understandable if he felt frustrated or disappointed, may not have been the most professional response. Aggressively confronting a customer is generally not considered appropriate in the service industry.
Communication: Open communication is vital in any situation. If you felt dissatisfied with the service, it could have been more constructive to communicate your concerns with the server or ask to speak to the manager to address the issues directly.
It's crucial to remember that interactions between customers and service staff can sometimes be sensitive and emotional. Both parties should strive to be respectful and understanding in resolving any issues that arise.
In summary, it's not productive to label anyone as a "." Instead, it's better to reflect on the situation, learn from it, and consider how to handle similar situations more effectively in the future.