Yes, it is possible to not remember childhood trauma. The human mind has the capacity to use various defense mechanisms, such as repression and dissociation, to cope with overwhelming or traumatic experiences. Repression is a psychological mechanism where the mind unconsciously blocks out or "forgets" painful memories to protect the individual from emotional distress. Dissociation, on the other hand, is a mental process that can lead to a disconnection between thoughts, identity, consciousness, and memory. Both of these mechanisms can contribute to the inability to recall traumatic events.
If you have experienced childhood trauma, but do not remember it, it doesn't mean that the experiences did not happen or that their impact is not affecting you in some way. Traumatic events can still leave traces on your emotions, behavior, and relationships even if you don't have conscious memories of them.
The reasons for your current emotional state and behavior may be complex and influenced by a variety of factors, not solely dependent on childhood trauma. Other environmental, genetic, and life experiences can also contribute to shaping who you are.
If you are struggling with emotional challenges or behavioral patterns and suspect that past trauma might be a factor, it could be helpful to seek support from a mental health professional. They can work with you to explore any potential traumatic experiences and help you process your feelings and experiences in a safe and supportive environment. Remember that seeking help is a sign of strength, and healing is possible with the right support and guidance.