Deciding whether to send someone an email or message about the fact that they caused you to have flashbacks from a traumatic event is a personal and complex decision. Here are some factors to consider before reaching a conclusion:
Safety and Well-being: Prioritize your own safety and well-being. If you believe that reaching out to the person could potentially put you in harm's way or exacerbate your emotional distress, it may be better to avoid contact.
Emotional Readiness: Consider whether you are emotionally prepared to engage in such a conversation. Reflect on how it may affect you and whether you have the support you need to cope with the potential consequences of sharing this information.
Purpose of Communication: Clarify your intentions for reaching out. Are you seeking closure, validation, an apology, or understanding? Understanding your motivations can help you communicate more effectively.
Potential Outcomes: Be aware that the person's response may not be what you hope for or expect. They may react defensively or deny any responsibility. Prepare yourself for various reactions and be mindful of how you might cope with them.
Privacy and Boundaries: Consider whether you want to have this conversation privately or in a more public forum. Think about what level of exposure and vulnerability you are comfortable with.
Seeking Professional Help: If the traumatic event still significantly affects your well-being, it might be beneficial to speak with a mental health professional before reaching out to the person. A therapist can provide guidance and support throughout the process.
Alternatives: Explore other avenues for healing and closure. Engaging in therapy, support groups, or self-help strategies can be effective in processing trauma and its effects.
Legal Implications: Depending on the nature of the traumatic event, there might be legal implications to consider before communicating with the person responsible. Consult with a legal professional if you believe legal action might be necessary or if you are unsure about your rights.
Ultimately, the decision is yours to make. If you do decide to communicate with the person, consider writing a draft first and giving yourself time to reflect before sending the message. You can also practice self-compassion and remind yourself that you have the right to prioritize your well-being and healing process.