It's important to recognize that not all covert narcissists will exhibit the same behaviors, and the reasons for individual behaviors can be complex and multifaceted. However, there are some potential explanations for why some covert narcissists may be unable or uncomfortable with hugging people:
Lack of genuine emotional connection: Covert narcissists often struggle with forming deep and authentic emotional connections with others. They might view physical affection like hugging as a way to maintain a facade of closeness or empathy, rather than a genuine expression of care or concern. Consequently, hugging might feel inauthentic or uncomfortable for them.
Fear of vulnerability: Hugging involves a degree of physical and emotional vulnerability. Covert narcissists tend to guard against showing vulnerability or emotional weakness, as it might contradict their self-image of being strong, self-sufficient, or invulnerable. Hugging could be perceived as a risk in terms of revealing emotions or getting too close to others.
Control and boundaries: Covert narcissists often seek to maintain control and boundaries in their relationships. Hugging might be seen as a relinquishing of control, and they may feel uncomfortable with the physical proximity and emotional openness that hugging implies.
Discomfort with intimacy: While some covert narcissists may seek attention and admiration, they may also feel uncomfortable with deeper forms of intimacy. Hugging can be seen as an intimate gesture that involves a level of emotional closeness, which might trigger discomfort or anxiety in a covert narcissist.
Social awkwardness: Some covert narcissists may lack social skills or have difficulty reading and responding appropriately to social cues. As a result, they might struggle with hugging and other forms of physical affection due to not knowing how to navigate such situations.
Manipulative tendencies: Covert narcissists might use physical affection selectively and manipulatively to control or manipulate others. If they perceive that hugging will serve their interests or help maintain a particular image, they may engage in it, but only when it suits their agenda.
It's crucial to understand that covert narcissism is a complex personality trait and not an official mental health diagnosis. If you are dealing with someone who displays narcissistic traits or any other challenging behavior, it's essential to set and maintain healthy boundaries, practice self-care, and consider seeking support from a mental health professional who can provide guidance in dealing with such individuals.