Narcissists derive pleasure and a sense of power from seeing others, especially their victims, in a state of distress or sadness. This behavior is rooted in the core characteristics of narcissistic personality disorder (NPD), which include an inflated sense of self-importance, a lack of empathy, and a deep need for admiration and attention.
Several reasons contribute to why narcissists like to see others sad:
Sense of Superiority: When a narcissist sees someone sad or distressed, it reinforces their belief in their own superiority. They may feel a sense of satisfaction, as it feeds their ego and makes them feel more powerful and in control.
Manipulation and Control: Narcissists often use emotional manipulation as a tool to control others. By causing someone to feel sad or emotionally vulnerable, they can keep them off balance and more dependent on the narcissist for validation and support.
Emotional Supply: Narcissists crave attention and emotional reactions from others, whether positive or negative. Seeing someone sad means they are eliciting a strong emotional response, which provides the narcissist with the narcissistic supply they seek to validate their self-worth.
Lack of Empathy: Narcissists lack genuine empathy for others, meaning they struggle to understand or care about the feelings and emotions of those around them. Consequently, they may not grasp the impact of their hurtful actions on others.
Controlled by Their Own Emotions: Narcissists can be emotionally volatile and may not be able to handle emotions in a healthy way. When they see someone sad, it might trigger their own feelings of inadequacy or vulnerability, and in response, they may try to regain a sense of control by causing distress in others.
It is essential to understand that the behavior of a narcissist is driven by their own psychological issues and does not reflect on the worth or value of the person experiencing the sadness. For those dealing with narcissists, setting healthy boundaries, seeking support from friends, family, or professionals, and considering limiting contact with the narcissist can be crucial steps in protecting their well-being.