Narcissists, like everyone else, have a need for love and validation. However, their ability to engage in healthy and reciprocated love is often impaired due to their personality disorder. Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD) is characterized by a pervasive pattern of grandiosity, a constant need for admiration, and a lack of empathy for others.
The reason narcissists may discard those who love them can be attributed to several factors:
Idealization and Devaluation: In the beginning stages of a relationship, narcissists may idealize their partners, seeing them as perfect and showering them with affection. However, as time passes and the initial idealization fades, they may start to devalue their partners, finding faults and shortcomings in them.
Fear of Intimacy: Narcissists often struggle with intimacy and genuine emotional connections. When someone gets too close to them and their flaws become evident, they may fear vulnerability and push that person away.
Need for Control: Narcissists often need to be in control of their relationships. If they perceive their partner becoming too independent or challenging their authority, they may resort to discarding them as a way to maintain control.
Lack of Empathy: Narcissists have difficulty empathizing with others' emotions and needs. As a result, they may not fully understand or appreciate the love and care their partner is offering them.
Seeking New Supply: Narcissists frequently seek new sources of admiration and validation. They may discard their current partner once they find someone new who can fulfill their need for attention and admiration.
It is important to understand that the behavior of narcissists is driven by their personality disorder and not a reflection of the worth or value of their partners. For those involved with narcissists, it is crucial to prioritize their own well-being and consider seeking support or counseling to navigate these challenging relationships. Additionally, if you suspect that you or someone you know may be dealing with a narcissist, it is advisable to seek professional help for a more comprehensive understanding and guidance.