Seeing one's partner as an extension of themselves is more commonly associated with Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD) rather than Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD). This behavior is related to the grandiosity and lack of empathy often seen in individuals with NPD.
In NPD, individuals tend to view others, including their partners, as objects to serve their needs, enhance their self-esteem, and fulfill their desires. They may seek partners who they believe will reflect positively on them, boost their self-image, and meet their emotional needs without reciprocation. The partners of individuals with NPD may feel controlled, devalued, or exploited, as their feelings and desires may be disregarded.
In contrast, Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) is characterized by unstable moods, self-image, and interpersonal relationships. Individuals with BPD may experience intense fear of abandonment and have difficulties maintaining stable and healthy relationships. They may have an intense emotional connection with their partners, but it is not typically based on viewing them as extensions of themselves. Instead, the fear of abandonment may lead to behaviors such as clinginess or push-pull dynamics, where the individual may alternate between idealizing and devaluing their partner.
Individuals with BPD often struggle with their own sense of identity, so their emotional connection to others can be intense and may sometimes lead to a sense of fusion with their partner. However, it is different from seeing their partner as an extension of themselves in the way that someone with NPD might do.
It's essential to recognize that personality disorders are complex and may present differently in each individual. Additionally, individuals can have traits or characteristics of multiple personality disorders, making diagnosis and understanding their behavior challenging. If you are concerned about your own relationship dynamics or those of someone else, it is advisable to consult with a qualified mental health professional who can provide a proper assessment and offer appropriate guidance and support.