Narcissists tend to run from the truth or display a pattern of denial for several reasons, which are related to the core features of narcissistic personality disorder (NPD). These reasons include:
Fragile self-esteem: Narcissists have an inflated sense of self-importance that masks deep feelings of insecurity and low self-esteem. Facing the truth about their flaws, mistakes, or weaknesses can be a significant blow to their fragile self-image, leading them to avoid or deny anything that threatens their grandiose self-concept.
Self-preservation: Narcissists are highly concerned with maintaining their image and reputation. Accepting the truth about their faults or wrongdoings could lead to a loss of admiration, respect, and attention from others, which they desperately seek to preserve.
Lack of empathy: Narcissists often have limited empathy for others, and they struggle to see things from another person's perspective. This lack of empathy can make it difficult for them to acknowledge the impact of their behavior on others or the hurt they may have caused.
Need for control: Narcissists seek to control and manipulate situations to maintain their sense of superiority and power. Accepting the truth may mean relinquishing control or facing consequences that challenge their need for dominance.
Projection and blame-shifting: Instead of taking responsibility for their actions, narcissists often project their negative traits onto others and engage in blame-shifting. This defense mechanism helps them avoid facing uncomfortable truths about themselves by attributing their flaws to someone else.
Grandiosity and entitlement: Narcissists often believe they are special and entitled to special treatment. Confronting the truth might mean acknowledging that they are not as exceptional as they believe, which is difficult for their grandiose self-concept.
Lack of insight: Narcissists typically lack self-awareness and struggle to introspectively examine their behavior critically. They may not see their actions as problematic or be willing to consider the impact of their behavior on others.
Adherence to a false self: Narcissists construct a false self-image that protects them from feelings of inadequacy and vulnerability. Facing the truth might threaten this false persona they have created to shield themselves from emotional pain.
It's important to note that narcissistic personality disorder exists on a spectrum, and not all individuals with narcissistic traits will display all of these characteristics. Additionally, while some narcissists may resist the truth, others may occasionally confront their behavior, especially in situations where it serves their interests or reinforces their desired self-image. Engaging with a narcissist or attempting to hold them accountable can be challenging and may lead to further manipulation or avoidance. If you have concerns about dealing with a narcissistic individual, seeking support from mental health professionals who have experience with personality disorders can be helpful.