I'm sorry to hear that you're experiencing such distressing emotions due to a childhood trauma. Dealing with anxiety related to trust and fear of being cheated on can be challenging, but there are some strategies you can try to help alleviate your anxiety during acute situations. Here are some suggestions:
Deep Breathing and Grounding Techniques: When you feel a panic state coming on, practice deep breathing exercises. Inhale slowly for a count of four, hold for four, and then exhale for four. Repeat this several times. Grounding techniques, like focusing on your senses and surroundings, can also help bring you back to the present moment.
Challenge Negative Thoughts: During moments of anxiety, try to identify the negative thoughts that are fueling your fear. Question their validity and challenge them with more realistic and balanced thoughts.
Self-Compassion and Acceptance: Understand that it's natural to have fears and anxieties, especially when triggered by past traumas. Be kind to yourself and practice self-compassion. Accept that you may feel anxious at times, and it's okay to seek support.
Distract Yourself: Engage in activities that can distract you from your anxiety. It could be reading a book, watching a movie, going for a walk, or doing something creative that you enjoy.
Talk to Your Partner: Open communication with your partner about your feelings and fears can be beneficial. Let them know about your past trauma and how it affects you. A supportive partner will understand your struggle and work with you to create a safe and trusting environment.
Therapy: Consider seeking professional help from a therapist or counselor who specializes in trauma and anxiety. Therapy can provide you with tools and coping mechanisms to deal with your anxiety and address the underlying trauma.
Mindfulness and Meditation: Mindfulness practices and meditation can help you become more aware of your thoughts and feelings without judgment. Regular practice can reduce anxiety and improve emotional regulation.
Avoid Substance Use: Avoid using alcohol or drugs as a way to cope with anxiety. They may provide temporary relief but can worsen anxiety in the long run.
Create a Safe Space: If possible, create a calming environment in your bedroom with items that bring you comfort, like soft blankets, soothing scents, or calming music.
Remember, healing from past traumas and managing anxiety can be a gradual process. Be patient with yourself and celebrate small victories along the way. If your anxiety persists or becomes overwhelming, don't hesitate to seek professional help for ongoing support and guidance.