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Dealing with a partner who has strong anger issues and differing opinions can be challenging, especially if your children are now independent. Here are some steps you might consider taking to address the situation:

  1. Open and Honest Communication: Have a calm and honest conversation with your wife about the anger issues and the challenges you both face due to differing opinions. Express your concerns and feelings, and encourage her to do the same.

  2. Counseling or Therapy: Suggest couples counseling or individual therapy for your wife to address her anger issues. A professional therapist can help her understand the root causes of her anger and provide tools to manage it more effectively.

  3. Set Boundaries: Establish clear boundaries for acceptable behavior and communicate these boundaries to your wife. It's essential to protect your emotional well-being.

  4. Practice Active Listening: Try to understand your wife's perspective and feelings without immediately jumping to counterarguments. Active listening can create a more constructive environment for communication.

  5. Find Common Ground: Focus on areas where you both share common values and interests. Finding common ground can help build a sense of connection and understanding.

  6. Respect Differences: It's natural for couples to have different opinions, and it's essential to respect each other's views, even if you don't agree. Healthy disagreements can lead to growth and better understanding.

  7. Personal Self-Care: Take care of your own well-being during this time. Engage in activities that bring you joy and reduce stress. Having a strong personal foundation can help you better handle challenges in the relationship.

  8. Consider Mediation: If your communication is particularly difficult, consider seeking the help of a mediator to facilitate constructive discussions.

  9. Evaluate the Relationship: Reflect on whether the relationship is meeting your needs and whether you are both willing to work on improving it. If you feel that the anger issues and differences are negatively impacting your happiness and overall well-being, you may need to evaluate the future of the relationship.

  10. Seek Support: Confide in trusted friends, family members, or a therapist about your situation. They can provide valuable insights and support during difficult times.

Remember, change takes time, and it's essential to be patient and compassionate with each other. If you believe that both of you are willing to work on the issues and the relationship, there is hope for positive growth and change. However, if you find that the relationship is no longer healthy for you, it might be necessary to explore other options. Professional guidance can be helpful in making the best decisions for your specific situation.

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