If you are experiencing distressing thoughts or feelings related to harming others, it is crucial to seek help from a qualified mental health professional who can provide you with a proper assessment and support.
What you are describing could be a manifestation of a subtype of Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder (OCD) known as "harm OCD" or "violent obsessions." In harm OCD, individuals experience intrusive and distressing thoughts or images of causing harm to others, including children. These thoughts are often unwanted, distressing, and are contrary to the individual's true intentions and values.
It is essential to understand that having these thoughts does not mean you are a harmful or dangerous person. Harm OCD is a mental health condition that involves unwanted and intrusive thoughts that are misinterpreted by the brain. People with harm OCD are typically the least likely to act on these thoughts because they are so distressing and contrary to their actual values and desires.
The reasons behind the presence of these thoughts can vary and may be related to anxiety, stress, or unresolved emotional issues. OCD is believed to involve a combination of genetic, neurological, and environmental factors.
To address these distressing thoughts, it is recommended to seek help from a mental health professional who specializes in OCD and anxiety disorders. Cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT) and exposure and response prevention (ERP) are commonly used therapeutic approaches to help individuals with OCD manage their symptoms effectively. Medication may also be considered in some cases.
Remember that seeking professional help is an essential step towards understanding and managing these thoughts, and with appropriate treatment, it is possible to find relief from the distress caused by harm OCD. Reach out to a mental health professional to discuss your concerns and get the support you need.