People who blame you for your reaction to their disrespect can exhibit both narcissistic and manipulative traits. Let's break down these two aspects:
Narcissistic Traits: Narcissists often have difficulty accepting responsibility for their actions and may lack empathy for others. When they disrespect someone and that person reacts negatively (e.g., setting boundaries, expressing their hurt feelings), instead of acknowledging their wrongdoing, a narcissistic individual may shift the blame onto the other person. They might act defensively, dismiss the other person's feelings as unwarranted, or even make the person feel guilty for having such reactions.
Manipulative Behavior: Blaming someone for their reaction to disrespect is also a manipulative tactic. By doing so, the manipulator aims to undermine the other person's self-confidence, emotions, or sense of reality. They want to maintain control over the situation and avoid being held accountable for their disrespectful actions.
It's important to note that not everyone who blames others for their reactions is necessarily a narcissist or manipulative. Sometimes, people may react defensively without intending to be manipulative, as they might struggle to acknowledge their mistakes or face uncomfortable emotions. However, persistent blaming and lack of accountability for disrespectful behavior can indicate deeper issues, such as narcissism or manipulative tendencies.
In any case, healthy relationships require open communication, empathy, and a willingness to take responsibility for one's actions. If you find yourself repeatedly facing blame for reacting to disrespectful behavior, it may be necessary to evaluate the dynamics of the relationship and consider seeking support or counseling to address any underlying issues.