When a narcissist doesn't get the reaction they desire, such as a response to the silent treatment or the discard, their behavior can vary depending on the individual and the specific circumstances. Here are some possible reactions from a narcissist when they don't get the reaction they expect:
Escalation: Some narcissists may escalate their tactics to regain control and attention. They might try more aggressive forms of manipulation, such as spreading rumors, engaging in smear campaigns, or attempting to hoover you back into the relationship by love bombing.
Anger and frustration: A narcissist may become angry and frustrated when they realize their tactics are not working. They might lash out verbally or emotionally to try and provoke a reaction from you.
Seeking alternative sources of supply: If they cannot get the reaction they want from you, they may seek validation and attention from other people, often searching for new targets to manipulate and control.
Silent treatment intensification: Some narcissists might increase the duration or intensity of the silent treatment, hoping that an extended absence will make you seek them out.
Pretending it doesn't bother them: In some cases, the narcissist may try to save face by pretending that your lack of reaction doesn't bother them, as they don't want to appear vulnerable or weak.
Sudden return: A narcissist may reappear suddenly, acting as if nothing happened, and attempting to re-engage you in the relationship. This "hoovering" technique is meant to draw you back in and reestablish control.
It's crucial to remember that narcissists are individuals, and their reactions may vary based on their personality, level of narcissism, and the specific circumstances of the relationship. Additionally, these reactions are not always predictable, and a narcissist's behavior can be highly manipulative and irrational.
If you find yourself dealing with a narcissist who is not getting the reaction they want, it's essential to continue focusing on your own well-being and maintaining healthy boundaries. Seek support from friends, family, or a mental health professional who can help you navigate the complexities of dealing with a narcissistic individual and support you in your healing process.