While it is possible for a narcissist to realize that they have lost someone who genuinely cared for them, the way they react or respond to this realization can vary depending on the individual and their level of self-awareness. Here are some possible scenarios:
Ego Bruising and Defensiveness: When a narcissist realizes that they have lost someone who truly cared for them, it can be a blow to their ego. They might become defensive and try to downplay the significance of the loss or the value of the relationship. They may also resort to blaming the other person for the breakup, avoiding any responsibility for their actions.
Seeking Reconciliation or Hoovering: In some cases, a narcissist may attempt to win back the person they lost. This behavior is known as "hoovering," where the narcissist tries to reestablish contact or reignite the relationship. They might use various manipulation tactics, promise change, or appeal to the victim's emotions to draw them back in.
No Realization or Lack of Genuine Emotion: It's essential to remember that narcissists often have difficulty empathizing with others, and their capacity for emotional introspection may be limited. As a result, some narcissists may not fully comprehend the depth of the loss or feel genuine remorse for their actions.
Moving on Quickly: While some narcissists might be temporarily affected by the loss, they may move on quickly to find a new source of attention, validation, or admiration. Their focus may shift to a new target or relationship, and they might appear to have moved on without any visible distress.
Feeling Abandoned and Seeking New Supply: If the narcissist relied heavily on the emotional support or validation from the person they lost, they might experience feelings of abandonment. To cope with these emotions, they may actively seek new sources of narcissistic supply to fill the void left by the lost relationship.
Self-Reflection and Change (Rare): In rare instances, some narcissists may undergo self-reflection and introspection, leading to genuine personal growth and change. This may involve seeking therapy or counseling to address their narcissistic traits and develop healthier ways of relating to others.
It's important to note that even if a narcissist realizes they lost someone who genuinely cared for them, this awareness doesn't guarantee a positive or healthy response. Narcissistic personality disorder is a complex and deeply ingrained condition, making lasting and significant changes challenging for many individuals with this disorder.
If you are dealing with a narcissistic individual and have experienced a difficult breakup, it's essential to prioritize your well-being and seek support from friends, family, or mental health professionals who can help you navigate through the healing process. Remember that you deserve a healthy and loving relationship built on mutual respect and care.