A narcissist might be upset to see you happy for several reasons, mainly related to their personality traits and insecurities:
Envy and Jealousy: Narcissists have an insatiable need for attention, admiration, and validation. When they see someone else, especially someone they perceive as inferior to them, experiencing joy or success, they may feel envy and jealousy. They struggle to handle the idea that someone else's happiness is taking attention away from them.
Need for Control: Narcissists crave control over people and situations. Your happiness and contentment may mean that you are becoming more independent and less reliant on them. This threatens their sense of control and can make them feel uncomfortable or upset.
Lack of Empathy: Narcissists often lack empathy, which means they struggle to genuinely understand and feel happy for others. Since they primarily focus on themselves, they may find it difficult to celebrate someone else's happiness because it doesn't directly benefit them.
Fear of Abandonment: Narcissists fear being abandoned or replaced. When they see others being happy and having positive experiences, they might fear that you will no longer depend on them or that you'll find someone better who will undermine their significance.
Comparing and Competing: Narcissists tend to constantly compare themselves to others and believe they are superior. Your happiness may trigger feelings of competition, and they might feel compelled to prove themselves or bring you down to regain their sense of superiority.
Attention Seeking: Narcissists are attention seekers. If your happiness is drawing attention and positive energy from others, they may feel threatened and try to undermine your joy to redirect the attention back to themselves.
Emotional Manipulation: Some narcissists use emotional manipulation to maintain control over others. If they see that your happiness could weaken their control or boundaries, they may act out in an attempt to undermine your emotions.
It's essential to remember that the motivations and behaviors of a narcissist are deeply rooted in their own issues, and their reactions are not a reflection of your worth or happiness. Dealing with a narcissist can be challenging, so setting healthy boundaries and seeking support from friends, family, or professional counseling may be necessary to navigate such relationships.