Narcissists have a personality disorder characterized by a grandiose sense of self-importance, a constant need for admiration and attention, and a lack of empathy for others. This exaggerated sense of self-importance is at the core of their thinking, leading them to believe that they are superior to others and that everyone wants them. Several factors contribute to this belief:
Grandiosity: Narcissists have an inflated sense of self and see themselves as special, unique, and superior to others. They believe they are more attractive, intelligent, and talented than others, leading them to assume that everyone must desire them.
Need for Validation: Narcissists have an insatiable need for admiration and validation. They constantly seek attention and approval from others to maintain their fragile self-esteem. When they receive attention, they interpret it as confirmation that everyone must want them.
Lack of Empathy: Narcissists have difficulty understanding and empathizing with the perspectives and feelings of others. They often see people as extensions of themselves, and they believe that others' actions are solely driven by their desire to be in the narcissist's company.
Projection: Narcissists may project their own desires and beliefs onto others. Since they are preoccupied with their own self-worth and importance, they assume others must feel the same way about them.
Idealization and Devaluation: Narcissists tend to idealize others when they first meet them, perceiving them as perfect or extraordinary. However, when others fail to meet their unrealistic expectations or challenge their grandiosity, narcissists may switch to devaluing those individuals.
Manipulation and Control: Believing that everyone desires them can also serve a manipulative purpose. By making others feel as though they are special for receiving the narcissist's attention, the narcissist gains control and can exploit their vulnerabilities.
It's essential to understand that narcissistic behavior stems from deep-seated insecurities and emotional wounds. While they may appear confident on the outside, inside, they are often struggling with a fragile self-image that requires constant reinforcement. As a result, they engage in these self-centered and self-aggrandizing behaviors to protect their ego from feeling inadequate or unimportant.