Covert narcissists are individuals who display many of the same characteristics as overt narcissists but tend to be more subtle and less outwardly grandiose in their behavior. They still have a strong need for narcissistic supply, which is the admiration, attention, and validation they seek from others to boost their fragile self-esteem.
While covert narcissists may go through various stages in relationships to secure their supply, there can be situations where they do not invest as much effort or attention in certain individuals. Some potential reasons for this could be:
Lack of Perceived Value: Covert narcissists tend to be highly focused on their own needs and desires. If they perceive you as not valuable enough to meet those needs or if you don't provide the level of admiration or attention they desire, they may not see you as a worthwhile target for their manipulation and control.
Secure Alternative Supply: If a covert narcissist already has a steady source of narcissistic supply from other individuals, they may not feel the need to invest as much energy in someone they consider less significant or replaceable.
Emotional Boundaries: If you establish strong emotional boundaries and are less likely to be swayed by their manipulative tactics, a covert narcissist might lose interest in pursuing you as a target because they find it more challenging to control you.
Empathy and Emotional Depth: Covert narcissists often seek out empathetic individuals who are willing to provide emotional support and validation. If you display a strong sense of empathy or emotional depth, they may avoid targeting you because they fear you might see through their manipulations or hold them accountable for their behavior.
Assertiveness: Covert narcissists may prefer targets who are more compliant and submissive, as they are easier to manipulate. If you display assertiveness or independence, they might feel threatened by the potential loss of control and choose not to pursue you as a target.
Previous Negative Experiences: If a covert narcissist has had negative experiences with you or perceives you as a potential threat to their self-image or false persona, they may avoid engaging with you to protect themselves from potential criticism or rejection.
Remember that narcissistic behavior is complex and can vary between individuals. Regardless of the reasons for not being targeted by a covert narcissist, it's essential to recognize that no one deserves to be involved in a manipulative or emotionally abusive relationship. Establishing and maintaining healthy boundaries, recognizing red flags, and seeking support from friends or professionals are essential steps to protect yourself from potential harm in any relationship.