I'm sorry to hear that you had to go through such a difficult and painful experience. Dealing with a narcissistic person can be incredibly challenging and emotionally draining. It's understandable that you might be struggling to accept the situation and move forward. Here are some steps that might help you in this process:
Allow yourself to grieve: It's important to recognize and validate the pain you've experienced. Give yourself permission to feel the emotions that come with it, whether it's anger, sadness, or frustration.
Seek support: Don't hesitate to reach out to friends, family, or even a therapist who can provide a listening ear, understanding, and guidance as you process your feelings.
Set boundaries: If possible, distance yourself from the person and avoid checking up on them or engaging in any contact that may reopen old wounds. This can help in the healing process.
Focus on self-care: Take time to focus on yourself and your well-being. Engage in activities that bring you joy, practice mindfulness, exercise, and take care of your physical and mental health.
Educate yourself: Learn more about narcissism and the dynamics of abusive relationships. Understanding the patterns and traits of a narcissist can help you make sense of what you went through and provide you with some closure.
Challenge negative thoughts: Narcissists often excel at gaslighting and manipulation, making their victims doubt their own worth and perception. Remind yourself that the abuse was not your fault and that you deserve respect and love.
Avoid comparisons: Try not to compare your healing process or your life to the narcissist's. Each person's journey is unique, and what they show to the world might not reflect their true emotional state.
Practice forgiveness (for yourself): It's not about forgiving the narcissist for their actions, but rather forgiving yourself for any perceived mistakes or vulnerabilities you might feel contributed to the situation.
Cultivate resilience: Healing takes time, but by nurturing your resilience, you can gradually regain your strength and move forward.
Focus on your future: Instead of dwelling on the past, look ahead to what you want to achieve and the positive changes you can make in your life.
Remember, healing from narcissistic abuse is a process, and it's okay to take the time you need to heal. Don't hesitate to seek professional help if you find it difficult to cope on your own. A therapist can provide valuable support and tools to aid in your healing journey.