Narcissistic individuals often exhibit manipulative and exploitative behavior, expecting others to serve and cater to their needs while showing little empathy or concern for others' feelings. This behavior can be particularly hurtful and damaging when it comes from a parent. There could be several reasons why your narcissistic mother expects you to help her and serve your parents, even after they have treated you poorly:
Sense of entitlement: Narcissistic individuals often feel entitled to special treatment and believe that others should cater to their needs without question.
Lack of empathy: Narcissists have difficulty understanding or caring about others' emotions and experiences, making it challenging for them to recognize the harm they cause.
Emotional manipulation: Narcissists may guilt-trip or emotionally manipulate their children into fulfilling their wishes, using tactics like emotional blackmail or gaslighting.
Control and power: Narcissistic parents may try to maintain control over their children's lives, even after they become adults, as a way to exert power and dominance.
External validation: Narcissists often crave constant admiration and validation from others. They may see their children as extensions of themselves and expect them to fulfill their desires to bolster their self-esteem.
Fear of abandonment: Narcissists may fear being abandoned or rejected by their children, leading them to try to maintain a sense of control over their adult children's lives.
It's essential to prioritize your well-being and safety in situations like this. If you find yourself in a toxic or abusive environment, consider seeking support from friends, other family members, or a mental health professional who can help you cope with the emotional impact and explore healthy strategies for setting boundaries and gaining independence.
Remember that your parents' behavior is not your fault, and you deserve to be treated with respect and kindness. Building a support network and seeking professional guidance can be essential steps toward healing and finding a healthier path forward.