When dealing with a narcissist who is upset or angry about the end of a relationship, they may employ manipulative tactics, including going "missing in action" (MIA) on purpose to express their displeasure or to exert control over you. Here are some signs that a narcissist may be going MIA on purpose due to their anger at the relationship's end:
Sudden disappearance: The narcissist may suddenly and completely disappear from your life without any explanation. They may stop responding to messages, calls, or any attempts at contact.
Silent treatment: The narcissist may use the silent treatment as a way to punish you for ending the relationship. They will ignore you and withhold communication, hoping that you'll feel hurt and desperate to reconnect with them.
Blocking and unfriending on social media: Narcissists often use social media as a tool for manipulation. If they block or unfriend you on various platforms, it can be a way of expressing anger and attempting to elicit a reaction from you.
No-shows and broken promises: When you try to make plans or arrangements to talk, the narcissist may not show up or cancel at the last minute, leaving you feeling confused and hurt.
Ignoring your needs: If you try to reach out for closure or to discuss the breakup, the narcissist may ignore your emotional needs and deny you the closure you seek.
Gaslighting and blame-shifting: If confronted about their disappearance, the narcissist may twist the narrative, gaslight you, and try to make you feel like it's your fault they went MIA.
Hoovering attempts: After going MIA for a period, the narcissist may reappear suddenly, acting as if nothing happened, and attempting to draw you back into the relationship. This "hoovering" technique is meant to regain control over you.
Seeking attention from others: While going MIA on you, the narcissist may be actively seeking attention and validation from other people. This can be evident through their social media posts or public behavior.
Using mutual connections: The narcissist may try to manipulate mutual friends or acquaintances to pass on messages or monitor your reactions during their absence.
Emotional manipulation: The narcissist may use their absence as a way to make you feel guilty or responsible for their emotional state, making you believe that you caused them to go MIA.
It's essential to remember that dealing with a narcissist can be emotionally challenging and draining. Recognizing these signs can help you maintain your emotional boundaries and protect yourself from further manipulation. If possible, seek support from friends, family, or a therapist to navigate the complexities of the situation.