Whether or not a narcissist comes back after a discard and divorce depends on various factors, including the individual narcissist's personality, their goals, and the circumstances surrounding the breakup. Narcissists can exhibit different behaviors after a breakup, and their actions may not always follow a predictable pattern. However, there are some common tendencies that narcissists may display in such situations:
Hoovering: As mentioned earlier, a narcissist might engage in hoovering, which is an attempt to "suck" their former partner back into the relationship. They may use tactics like love bombing, false promises of change, or appealing to emotions to regain control and attention.
Ego Boost: For some narcissists, returning to a former partner can serve as an ego boost. They may want to prove to themselves that they can win you back, or they might feel gratified by your continued attention and desire for them.
Loss of Control: The end of a relationship can threaten a narcissist's sense of control and superiority. In response, they may try to regain control by coming back into your life.
Seeking Validation: Narcissists often crave validation and admiration. Returning to a former partner can be an attempt to receive that validation, as you might have been a source of validation for them in the past.
Finding a New Source: If the narcissist is unable to find a new source of narcissistic supply (attention, admiration, or control) after the divorce, they might attempt to come back to their former partner.
Utilizing Vulnerabilities: Narcissists can be skilled at identifying vulnerabilities and emotional weaknesses. They might exploit these vulnerabilities to manipulate you into taking them back.
It's essential to recognize that if a narcissist comes back after a discard and divorce, their motivations are likely self-serving and driven by a desire for control and attention, not genuine love or concern for your well-being.
If you find yourself in this situation, it's crucial to maintain strong boundaries and prioritize your emotional well-being. Consider seeking support from friends, family, or a therapist to help you navigate this challenging period and avoid falling into the trap of a toxic relationship again.
Remember, you deserve to be in a healthy, respectful, and loving relationship that supports your growth and well-being.