Narcissists may act like it's nothing when they hurt you for several reasons related to their personality traits and defense mechanisms:
Lack of Empathy: Narcissists often lack the ability to empathize with others, meaning they struggle to understand or feel the emotional impact of their hurtful actions on others. They may have difficulty connecting with the emotions of others and might dismiss or trivialize your feelings.
Self-Centeredness: Narcissists have an inflated sense of self-importance and tend to prioritize their own needs and desires above others. To them, their feelings and concerns take precedence, and they may not give much weight to how their actions affect you.
Defensive Mechanism: To maintain their self-image and avoid taking responsibility, narcissists may adopt defense mechanisms like denial and rationalization. They might downplay or ignore their hurtful actions to protect themselves from feelings of guilt or shame.
Manipulation and Control: Some narcissists intentionally act like hurting you is insignificant because it gives them a sense of power and control. By minimizing the impact of their actions, they keep you off-balance and more susceptible to further manipulation.
Superiority Complex: Narcissists often have an inflated sense of superiority and entitlement, believing they are above reproach and immune to criticism. Acknowledging the harm they cause would challenge their grandiose self-image, which they are unwilling to do.
Lack of Emotional Awareness: Narcissists may struggle with understanding and processing emotions, both their own and others'. As a result, they may not fully grasp the emotional consequences of their actions on those around them.
Avoiding Vulnerability: Displaying genuine remorse or concern for hurting someone requires vulnerability, which is something narcissists tend to avoid at all costs. They may fear that acknowledging their wrongdoing would make them appear weak or flawed.
It's important to remember that narcissistic behavior is deeply ingrained and not easy to change. Trying to reason with a narcissist or expecting them to show remorse and empathy might lead to frustration and disappointment. If you find yourself dealing with a narcissistic individual who consistently hurts you, it's crucial to prioritize your own well-being and consider seeking support from friends, family, or a mental health professional to help you cope with the situation and potentially set healthy boundaries or distance yourself from the toxic relationship.