I'm sorry to hear that you're going through such a difficult situation. It's essential to address the issue of both verbal abuse and physical reactions in a relationship. Reacting with violence is not a healthy response and can escalate the situation further. Here are some steps you can take to address the issue and find healthier ways to cope:
Prioritize your safety: If your boyfriend's behavior becomes physically threatening, remove yourself from the situation to ensure your safety. Go to a safe place where you can calm down and collect your thoughts.
Seek support from friends or family: Talk to someone you trust about what you're going through. Opening up about the situation can provide emotional support and different perspectives on how to handle the situation.
Communicate when he is sober: When your boyfriend is not under the influence of alcohol, try to have a calm and honest conversation about his behavior and how it makes you feel. Choose a safe and private setting to discuss your concerns.
Set boundaries: Clearly communicate your boundaries and let him know that verbal abuse and physical aggression are unacceptable. Be firm about your limits and what you are willing to tolerate in the relationship.
Encourage professional help: Suggest that your boyfriend seeks help for his drinking problem and anger issues. Encourage him to attend counseling or therapy sessions to work on managing his emotions and alcohol consumption.
Seek couples therapy: If you both are willing to work on the relationship, consider seeking couples therapy. A therapist can provide guidance on communication skills, conflict resolution, and addressing underlying issues.
Focus on self-improvement: Take care of your own emotional well-being and personal growth. Engage in activities that bring you joy and surround yourself with supportive people.
Consider your options: If the verbal abuse and aggression continue despite your efforts, it may be necessary to reevaluate the relationship. Your safety and well-being should always come first.
Remember that you cannot change someone else's behavior, but you can control how you respond to it. Seek professional help if needed, and never hesitate to reach out to local support organizations or helplines specializing in domestic abuse if you feel unsafe or overwhelmed.