When a narcissist realizes that they have lost a person and that there is no chance of reconciliation, their reaction can vary depending on the individual and the specific circumstances. Here are some common ways a narcissist may respond:
Discard and move on: Some narcissists may simply discard the person and move on to find a new source of validation and attention. They might view the loss as a blow to their ego but quickly seek to replace the person with someone else who can provide the admiration and adoration they crave.
Seek revenge or retaliation: If the narcissist perceives the rejection as a threat to their self-esteem or superiority, they may react with anger and seek revenge or retaliate in some way. This retaliation could take the form of spreading rumors, engaging in smear campaigns, or attempting to damage the person's reputation.
Hoovering: Hoovering is a tactic used by some narcissists to attempt to draw a discarded person back into a relationship. They may try to reestablish contact, use charm, or promise change in an effort to regain control and validation from the person they lost.
Playing the victim: Some narcissists may portray themselves as the victim of the situation, blaming the other person for the relationship's failure and seeking sympathy and attention from others.
Devaluation: If the narcissist cannot have the person back, they may resort to devaluing them to maintain a sense of superiority. They may speak negatively about the person, belittle their accomplishments, and undermine their self-esteem.
Move on nonchalantly: In some cases, the narcissist may appear nonchalant or indifferent about the loss, particularly if they have already secured other sources of admiration and validation.
Self-isolation or self-pity: A narcissist may also retreat into self-isolation or self-pity, feeling sorry for themselves and wallowing in their own perceived victimhood.
It's important to remember that narcissists' behaviors are driven by their deep-seated need for validation, admiration, and control. Their reactions to rejection may be unpredictable and can depend on various factors, such as the severity of their narcissism, their emotional state at the time, and the perceived impact of the loss on their self-image.
If you have severed ties with a narcissistic individual and are concerned about potential retaliation or harm, it's essential to prioritize your safety and well-being. Consider reaching out to a support network, seeking professional guidance, or involving appropriate authorities if necessary.